聽神談【正視：人類「親密關係」中最悲慘的誤解】-1/2
關於關係(relationships)，這是一個非常基本、非常簡單，但已被人們非常悲慘地誤解的問題：你們最大的夢想，你們最高的想法，以及你們最喜愛的希望，都是與你們摯愛的別人(other)，而非你們摯愛的自己(Self)有關。你們對關係的測試考驗始終在於「別人能附合你的想法多少，以及你覺得自己能附合他人的想法多少」。然而，真正的考驗卻只在於「你能附合你更高自己的想法」有多少」。
關係是神聖的，因為關係提供了人生最大的機會——的確，它是唯一的機會——去創造及產生你們對「較高的自己」之最高觀念的經驗(to create and produce the experience of your highest conceptualization of Self)。而當你們將關係視為去創造及產生你們對「別人」之最高觀念的經驗時，關係便會失敗。
讓每個在關係裡的人去掛念自己「較高的自己」——掛念較高的自己being什麼、做什麼和有什麼；較高的自己想要什麼、要求什麼、給與什麼；較高的自己在尋求什麼、創造什麼和經驗什麼——以及參與者，那麼，所有的關係都將宏偉美妙地服務於每個人的意圖！
讓在關係裡的人別去擔心別人(other)，卻僅僅、僅僅、只要擔心和掛念自己「較高的自己」(Self)。(註：字首大寫的 Self 在與神對話信息中的意思是指「真正的自己」、「較高的自己」或許多心靈教導和通靈信息所稱的「高我」、「本我」，或「higher mind 較高心智」。不是指頭腦當家的「physical mind 物質心智」。)
這聽起來似乎是個奇怪的說法，因為你們所聽說過的是：在最高層次的關係裡，一個人要掛念的只是別人。然而，我告訴你們：你們把焦點集中在別人身上——你對別人的癡迷糾纏——才是造成關係失敗的原因(your focus upon the other—your obsession with the other—is what causes relationships to fail)。
別人being(處於)什麼？別人在做(doing)什麼？別人在獲有(having)什麼？別人在說什麼？想要什麼？要求什麼？別人在想什麼？期待什麼？計畫什麼？
大師(Master)明白「別人being什麼、在做什麼、有什麼、說什麼、需要什麼、要求什麼」都沒有關係。別人在想什麼、期待什麼、計畫什麼也沒有關係。唯一有關係(重要)的是，在你與那些的關係中，你being(是、處於、散發著)什麼(It only matters what you are bing in relationship to that.)。
最具有愛的人是那「以較高自我為中心」的人(The most loving person is the person who is Self-centered.)。
摘自《與神對話 I》第8章
The problem is so basic, so simple, and yet so tragically misunderstood: your grandest dream, your highest idea, and your fondest hope has had to do with your beloved other rather than your beloved Self. The test of your relationships has had to do with how well the other lived up to your ideas, and how well you saw yourself living up to his or hers. Yet the only true test has to do with how well you live up to yours.
Relationships are sacred because they provide life’s grandest opportunity—indeed, its only opportunity—to create and produce the experience of your highest conceptualization of Self. Relationships fail when you see them as life’s grandest opportunity to create and produce the experience of your highest conceptualization of another.
Let each person in relationship worry about Self—what Self is being, doing, and having; what Self is wanting, asking, giving; what Self is seeking, creating, experiencing, and all relationships would magnificently serve their purpose—and their participants!
Let each person in relationship worry not about the other, but only, only, only about Self.
This seems a strange teaching, for you have been told that in the highest form of relationship, one worries only about the other. Yet I tell you this: your focus upon the other—your obsession with the other—is what causes relationships to fail.
What is the other being? What is the other doing? What is the other having? What is the other saying? Wanting? Demanding? What is the other thinking? Expecting? Planning?
The Master understands that it doesn’t matter what the other is being, doing, having, saying, wanting, demanding. It doesn’t matter what the other is thinking, expecting, planning. It only matters what you are being in relationship to that.
The most loving person is the person who is Self-centered.
